Ganpati Bappa.Morya

"Aai, please let me play, all of my friends must have reached the ground already!" Apu pleaded with his mother.

"Finish your homework first, only then you can go," Aai replied.

"Pleeeeaseeeeeee...my lovely mother, my sweet mother," Apu unleashed his weapon of flattery mixed with innocence that always worked with his mother.

"Okay.but you will be back within two hours, no playing after dark. Ok?" Aai relented.

"Promise aai, I will be back soon," Apu closed his notebook and ran towards the door with his tiny feet.

"Badmaash," Aai smiled. After all, her world revolved around her only son Apu. Her gaze shifted from the trail of dust that a running Apu left behind him to a few photographs hanging on the wall. Apu was playing in his father's lap in one of the photographs taken at the Mount Mary fair when he was barely a year old. Another photograph had her, Apu's father and then two-year-old Apu, all smiling, cutting his birthday cake. There were few more pictures--as a little baby posing with his father.

Apu was hardly three when Ramakant, his father, was killed in a road accident. After her husband's death, Mugdha tried hard to ensure that Apu never feels the void left behind by his Appa. And she had done it with a great measure of success.

As Apu reached the small playground, he could see his friends gathered in one corner of the ground discussing in hushed voices, their bats on their shoulders, looking all grown up. A few yards away from them few men were laying blue tarpaulin sheets over the wooden skeleton of a pandal. An idol of Ganesha was to be installed and elaborate arrangements were in store for lighting and decoration.

It was clear that the boys were forbidden from playing on the ground.

"Narayan, what are these people doing?" Apu tucked at Narayan's sleeve and asked ingenuously. Apu, at six years of age, was the youngest amongst his friends.

Ten year old Narayan was the eldest, and by default the leader of their group. To his younger groupies, he had the answers to everything that they did not know.

This time too, Narayan didn't disappoint.

"Aree buddhu, tomorrow is Ganesh Chaturthi. You even don't know this?" Narayan asked him in an I-know-all tone.

"Ganesh Chaturthi?" Apu asked incredulously.

"Yes.Ganpati festival. Ganpati comes to our homes and give us whatever we pray for to Him," Shibu, another friend of Apu, pitched in grinning widely, "It's so much fun, we will have sweets, new clothes, and gifts. Ganpati will come to my home; I will dance and then with my father, I will carry the idol to the sea to immerse Him. Ganpati will give us whatever we want."

"Anything we ask for?" Apu asked with eyes wide open.

"Haan re khajoor, after all Ganpati is God, don't you know?" Narayan replied.

.....

Apu entered his home silently, lost in his own thoughts. His clothes and feet were not dusty like they always were post play time.

"Aree Apu, You are back so early?" Aai asked.

Apu rushed towards his mother swaying his head side-to-side, and hugged her. He was so small that he couldn't even reach her waist. Aai picked him up.

"What happened Apu? Did you again fight with Shibu?" Aai asked running her fingers through his hair.

"Aai, is Ganapati God? Can Ganpati give us anything?"

"Yes son, Ganpati is God and he can grant anything one prays for.but why are you asking this?" she was amused by his questions.

"Shibu said that tomorrow Ganpati will come and he will give us everything that we pray for," Apu asked looking at his mother. Innocence was breathing in lively through his eyes, voice and posture.

"Hmmm.Well.Yes.That's true dear but what do you want from God?" she unfolded her arms and made him sit on the bed.

"First tell me, is it true that tomorrow Ganpati will visit our home?" Apu hurled another question at his mother. He wanted his questions to be answered first; all his questions weren't answered yet.

"Yes son, Ganpati will surely come tomorrow morning," she gave in to her son's inquisitiveness, "Now tell me, what my ssona beta will ask for from Ganpati?"

"Aai, I will ask for lots of chocolates, gifts and.." Apu stopped midway.

"And.?"

Apu sat silently.

"Apu.?" she questioned again.

There was no answer.

She put her hands around his face and asked softly, "My son, won't you tell your Aai?"

For a second, she found his silence very uncomfortable. Now, Apu was testing his mother's patience.

"Tell me Apu.please son," her patience was running out.

"And..Baba," Apu whispered softly, looked at his mother and sank tightly onto her bosom. His words were almost inaudible. His tears wet her sari.

For a second, she went numb. First time since Ramakant's death, she sensed how deeply Apu missed his father. For a moment, flood of tears broke its boundary and she gave in to her misery of loneliness. She closed her eyes and tears, pregnant with feelings, ran slowly down her cheeks.

She hurriedly wiped away the last traces of her misery, stopping them at the threshold of her luminous eyes and faked a smile.

"Let's get up, now Apu will watch cartoon network and have his delicious dinner," she said trying to steady her voice.

"No.I want Baba," Apu made his wish obvious.

"Today, I have made your favorite dish Kheer, full of kaju-kishmish," she tried to divert his attention but it was not working.

"No, I don't want anything, bring me my Baba," Apu had started to growl loudly, "All of my friends have Baba except me, am I that bad, Aai?"

"No Apu, my son, no," Apu's words almost brought her again to the brink of breakdown. Every single word he said was hammering her mind thousand times, as if all the blood had been soaked out of her body.

"Aai, why don't you tell me where is my Baba? I want Baba right now," Apu continued in his stubborn ways unaware of his mother's misery.

"I told you to just have dinner and sleep," she yelled. She really didn't know what to tell to Apu.

Apu started crying inconsolably. Apu kept crying till late night. Her efforts to console him went in vain.

"Tomorrow, I will ask Ganpati to give me my Baba," Apu uttered amidst muffled sobs and finally slept.

Today, Apu had slept without eating anything for first time. Her little boy was big enough to take his own decisions now.

"My son, I am helpless," she said looking at sleeping Apu's face, "Oh God, I am really broken today." Apu's face was still wet with tears.

......

"Apu..Apu...I am here,"

Apu turned back and saw a large figure with a long trunk hanging from his nose was sitting beside him on his bed.

"Aree.who are you?"

"I am Ganpati, your friend, for whom you were waiting to meet."

"Ganpati." Apu gazed at Ganpati in disbelief, "but you were supposed to come in the morning na?"

"I came especially for you.see.I have brought laddoos and gifts for you.would you like to be my friend, Apu?" This cute teddy with imploring eyes brought a gift of friendship that was sure to melt the heart.

"Yes Ganpati, but I want something more than these gifts.will you give me that?"

"Yeah sure, anything for my dear Apu.we are now friends; aren't we?"

"Yes. we are." Apu stopped for a second and then continued, "Ganpati, I want my Baba, please give me my Baba."

Ganpati smiled and kissed Apu's forehead, and said, "Sure Apu.I promise.you will meet your Baba very soon."

"Tomorrow?" Apu asked excitedly.

"No.but soon you will meet your Baba, it's my promise."

"Thank You Ganpati," Apu smiled all the while struggling with the gifts in his hands.

....

"Apu.Apu.get up son.its eight' o clock already," Aayi called out Apu from the kitchen.

Apu got up rubbing his eyes with sight of Ganpati still fresh in mind. The sharp rays of sun coming through the windows made seeing clearly a little difficult. As soon as his eyes could bear the light, he looked around for Ganpati but there was no one. For a moment, he was stung by deep sadness. As he walked toward the bathroom, his eyes stopped at the few wrapped packet of laddoos and gifts on a table in the corner. Suddenly, he felt a spring added in his steps. Apu ran towards the kitchen.

"Aayi, do you know whom I met last night?" Apu said standing near the pot. His eyes had a glint of joy, shining through his merry voice.

"Last night? No, I don't know," Aayi could sense his cheery mood so she too pitched in with her chirpiness, "who was it haan?"

"Ganpati!" Apu grinned with full gusto as he came nearer to his mother.

"Really??" she was pleasantly surprised to hear this, "then what happened, Apu?"

"Yes Aayi, Ganpati was sitting with me on my bed," Apu pointed towards his bed and continued in his pleased tone, "Ganpati is so nice, and he gave me laddoos and gifts. Didn't you see the gifts kept on the table near T.V.?"

"Wow." she sat next to him on the floor. She was enjoying this sweet conversation and Apu's bright mood, "So Ganpati brought those gifts for my lovely son? I am so happy."

"Yes.and there is one surprise for you." Apu was excited.

"Another surprise.what is that?" She smiled and turned to him, tousling his hair with affection.

"Guess?" Apu said rolling his eyes.

"Please tell na," Aayi showed artificial curiosity.

"Ganpati has promised me to give my Baba very soon, just little wait and he will be with us again," his voice raised as he finished.

For one moment, she was shocked. She thought that Apu is happy because of gifts she had bought for him in the morning and had forgotten about his Baba. But, he was still looking for his Baba. She stood like a statue staring at him with sadness in her eyes. Suddenly she held him close to her bosom with a passionate cry.

"Apu.my son.your Baba will never come.never ever." she revealed the bare truth.

"No, he will surely come; my friend Ganpati has promised me to give me my Baba. Ganpati won't lie to me, Aayi," he said, coming out of her arms. Apu's desperation of shattered hope was obvious in his sound.

"My son.please understand.and then.I am with you na, your mother is with you, Apu," she almost pleaded.

"But I want Baba too," Apu said bluntly. Ganpati's promise had made Apu more convinced.

The mother kept looking at the sheer stubbornness or say, determination of six-years old with her empty eyes.

.....

Shouts of "Ganpati bappa Morya. pudchya varshi lavkar ya", beating drums, devotional songs, accompanied the procession converged towards the beach to immerse the holy idols in the sea. The teenagers, elders and children sprinkled gulal while dancing to the tune of drums amidst the chanting of 'Ganesh Maharaj Ki Jai!' and 'Ganpati bappa morya' loudly. Many other followers were inching along in the flooded street.

At sunset, loaded down with enthusiasm, their faces happy, their shouts filling the air with Ganpati charm, procession came near to Apu's home. Apu brought his face out of the school book, got up from the bed and ran towards the door. Aai looked at Apu with concerned eyes. Even before she could stop him, Apu had crossed the threshold and started chanting "Ganpati bappa Morya. pudchya varshi lavkar ya" in his soft voice which drowned in the heavy drumming. She could see Apu from the courtyard swing.

Apu turned, came inside and stood in front of her. His eyes were glued to her face, questioning his mother. Apu's eyes, she could see, were searching for permission to go for the immersion. They were pleading her to take him to the sea.

He was patient from past ten days just because what really mattered at all was Ganpati, his friend's assurance to him. She got up from the swing and walked up to Apu. She had given up on everything she could do to make Apu accept the truth. But a child's heart knew nothing of worldly logics. For him, Ganpati's promise was the biggest reason to ignore the rest of world.

"Apu," Aai said looking at Apu smiling, "I am going to beach, do you want to come along or you want to stay here and finish your homework?"

It brightened up his heart and brought in a feeling of inexplicable joy on his face. Apu was bit hesitating or say, afraid to request his mother but here Aai herself was asking him to go for the same.

She locked the door and joined the procession with Apu.

Vast stretches of polluted sands, bathed in the golden sunshine were a spectacular sight to watch. A light drizzle had failed to dampen the spirit of revelers swinging to the tunes of traditional dhol and tashas and sprinkling of gulal, vermilion. All this way, Apu, full of joy, holding his mother's hand, was chanting loudly with other devotees. Dadar chowpaty was packed with surging mass of humanity as the idols of Ganesh were carried towards their watery rest among chants.

As the moment of immersion was approaching fast, Apu was getting restless. He was looking all around, to all the strange faces in large crowd, searching for his Baba. Every passing second was making him restless. She was conscious of his impatience and was worried too for Apu's impulsive reaction. The red color gulal wet with rain drops was merged in Apu's white check shirt.

Curtains finally rolled down on the 10-day Ganesh festival, as people bid adieu to the elephant-headed-God amidst chants of "Ganpati bappa Morya. pudchya varshi lavkar ya".

Ganesh idol were immersed in the sea where special arrangements were made for immersion of 21 feet tall Ganesh idol. Apu, standing on the shore of the sea, found his last hope of meeting his Baba, going away deep into the water.

With barely any time to think, let alone act for mother, Apu sprang upon his feet and ran towards the sea with stalwart resolve. He got the strong power to run hard even with his tiny steps. As he ran through, her hands trembled and heartbeat sped up.

"Apu.stop son..Apu stop," she shouted with all her strength. But Apu made no answer. Apu was now standing in the mid of waves, trying to see a glimpse of his friend Ganesha. His eyes scanned every tiny drop of water looking for Ganesha who was immersing fast in the sea.

"Ganpati." Apu shouted, "Where is my Baba, please give me my Baba Ganpati."

The moment Aai saw Apu, a strong wave rolled and pushed him towards the sea. An eerie cry broke from Apu, his breathe choking in his throat. Apu was drowning. She too ran hard and sprang into the sea, arms outstretched. She cried out in pain trying to hold his hand. But waves were too strong for Apu's little body.

Throwing her hands around in the deep water, she somehow managed to swim with her amateur swimming skills, but there was no sign of her son. Her worst fear had come true. Apu was drowned. Her lips felt the salty water as it mixed with her tears. Suddenly one wave rolled up, splashed over her.

As some of the water went down her neck, she saw a little glimpse of Apu, trying hard to come up against strong wave; she mustered her courage and moved ahead. Slipping, stumbling, she continued to struggle against the python of waves and for a moment caught hold of Apu's hand. One false move could spell death. Apu too hold his Aai's hand tightly like the drowning man would clutch at straws. Within few moments, Apu was sitting on the shore, breathless and gasping. It took few minutes for Apu to come to his senses.

Few people including Shibu's mother, who witnessed all this, were amazed at mother's undying spirit and courage she showed to save her son.

"What a brave woman she is?" a man gushed standing at the shore.

"She has done something that a father could have done to save his son," another man said.

"Who needs a father when one has such brave loving mother? She is more than a father to her son," Shibu's mother said smilingly.

Apu heard everything attentively. He looked towards the sky and whispered, "I got my Baba, Ganpati, I got my Baba." Apu stretched his arms to hug his Aayi. Today she was a complete mother. Her soul was smiling through her tears. That night a new moon rose, showering its soothing light on giant sea and broken souls equally.

.....

("Ganpati bappa Morya. pudchya varshi lavkar ya" --- Come back soon next year, Oh Victorious Lord Ganesh).

"Guys what's the plan this weekend?" Amit drawled in his carefully cultivated call center accent, all the while adjusting spikes gelled out of his hair.

"Yes yaar, John Ibrahim's Salam-e-Ishq is releasing this Friday," Manish joined him, "Meghna is a big fan of that loser. She will join us of course."

Manish's lips upturned in a goofy smile he smiled when he mentioned his girlfriend.

"Ritu too will come to movie; first movie and then dinner at Sheesha, it will be great fun," Amit reminded both Manish and Shyam not to forget her girlfriend either.

"So, it's done," Manish said as he got up from his chair. Both looked at Shyam with a dude-you-got-nothing-to-say ex-pression.

"Well, I am busy this weekend," Shyam made an excuse looking slightly unsure of himself, "there is some urgent work at home, you guys enjoy."

"What nonsense!" Amit said in irritated tone.

"Shut up you bozo," Manish chided Shyam, "You are coming and that's final, no argument."

Shyam kept quiet.

.....

Shyam was twenty-one. He never had a girlfriend or even dated in his entire life. He never had any female friend. The only female friend (one-sided friendship) Shyam had in his 9^th standard math tuition classes, the time when he had just hit the puberty and it lasted maybe a month. He went to all boys' school, which made meeting girls impossible at that time as well. It was not as if he was a complete introvert. The idea of personal rejection scared the shit out of him.

The pressure of not having girlfriend was getting to him now.

"All your friends have girlfriend, what about you?" Papa would tease him occasionally.

"Papa.I want to focus on studies right now," Shyam would come up with his standard excuse every time papa or anyone else threw this question to him. But now, he had finished his college degree and was about to join a job.

When growing up, he heard names like "faggot," "pansy," "queer," "momma's boy," and "homo."

"Oye homo, find a psychologist, you weirdo," one of his friend once made a mockery of his and laughed.

.....

As they reached the multiplex, both Ritu and Meghna were waiting for them. The girls were not very good looking, but that was secondary.

"I am single with no one to call my own and these buggers are having a blast," Shyam murmured to himself.

"Hiiii Shyam!" both Meghna and Ritu came up with typical girlish tone.

"Hi"

For a moment, Shyam couldn't look the girls in the eye. He was a loser. In a city teeming with girls, girls and more girls, here he was all alone. Loser! Loser! He thought he heard everyone around him murmur.

Manish bought the tickets and they entered the lobby. The sights and sounds added to the woes of an already depressed Shyam. He increasingly felt out of place; like a eunuch in an orgy. All he could see were couples lost in each others eyes, limbs entwined, and lips littering sweet nothings. A dragonfly couple buzzed past him, their bodies cupped together in an acrobatic splendor. They settled on a poster in the lobby which had a man kissing the girl of his dreams.

"Even insects seem to have soul mates, and here I am. who has never been kissed," Shyam sulked looking at the flooring with disgust. It seemed like forever though it might have only been two minutes.

The noisy group walked in the aisle looking for their seats. A bored usher showed them where their seats were, 'sit next to that fat aunty.' Once they found their seats, there was no confusion as to who sits where. Shyam sat on the corner seat by the aisle, then Amit, Ritu, Meghna and Manish. Manish and Amit had their arms around their girlfriend's shoulder; they ran their fingers in the girls' hair.

The screen came to life with advertisements.

Feeling fresh and energetic after brushing his teeth a guy gives a bright shining smile to himself in the mirror. Energized with his Close-up fresh breath, he walks down the road charming the women on the way. Walking past a group of girls he dazzles them with his refreshing Close-up smile. One beautiful girl puts her arms around him. A jingle traveled across the dark auditorium: "Saath chale to baat chale."

Shyam smirked a smirk covered in sarcasm and disdain.

Movie began with a romantic duet. The story was full of romance and love, emotions that Shyam knew well, but fate never allowed him to express.

Here, Shyam was all alone, much like a lighthouse bordering the sea of love, drowned in his loneliness. On the surface one saw him smiling...but deep down inside there's the undertow...and he didn't fight it anymore A dry life bereft of any romantic notion, how he could enjoy filmy romance and dreamy dialogues. To him, the entire world was conspiring against him, laughing at his single status. He felt like he was missing out on an important part of his life emotionally and sexually. Movie came to an end unlike his lonely thoughts.

As they entered Sheesha, the famous restaurant sprawled on terrace of the multiplex, cold breeze with melodious music welcomed them. Ritu found everything quite refreshing. In her black eyes the joy of bliss sparkled, she said in her beaming voice, "Wow.a fantastic movie, cold breeze, full-moon night, and dinner with beloved in arms, what one can ask for more? It's heaven."

"Absolutely true," Meghna smiled as she softly pulled Manish closer.

Shyam gazed skywards, at the stars gleaming in the darkening night, and whispered, "I don't belong to this heaven."

.....

Shyam walked in his room, switched on the light and fell on the bed like a dead body. He kept staring at the ceiling with blank mind. Shyam was completely put off with himself, with the world, with almost everything. Another sleepless night passed just in thoughts of self-pity.

He always had been giving himself all the clichés..."stay strong," "hang in there," "keep on trying," and "It's not the end of the World," but the bottom line was, "There isn't someone for me."

He'd had his heart broken several times before even getting anywhere with a girl. Everyone he knew had been out with several people.

He remembered Amit's birthday; he was introduced to Ritu's friend. Everything went well, he was very happy to meet the girl. She too seemed to be interested in him and conversation led to friendship. He was extremely polite and caring towards her, giving her full importance. Manish asked him to drop her at home on his bike. He continued his conversation on the way too but she was not too much involved.

"Am I talking too much?" Shyam thought, "Nahi yaar, she needs company, if I won't say anything, that would be rudeness on my part."

When they reached outside her home, Shyam mustered the courage and asked for her number. She gave the number a bit hesitantly. He too gave his phone number to her. The ride back home was the happiest ride of his life.

"Now I have her phone number, but I won't do any silly mistake this time," he was excited, "Its not a good idea to call her today only, I would wait for two-three days, if she doesn't call, then I would give her a call."

"You have hit the jackpot Mr. Shyam," he grinned and patted himself.

Two days passed but no call from her. Shyam opened his contact list and dialed her number.

"This number doesn't exist; please check the number," the operator announced, "This number doesn't exist; please check the number."

He kept trying the same number and heard the ever frustrating pre-recorded voice of a female.

"She lied to me!" his mind echoed the thought.

"She could deny then only, why she lied to me?" Shyam was anything but a liar and he hated liars.

It took him several days to get out of this shock. He even didn't ask Ritu about that girl again.

One day, Manish called him at home.

"Hi Shyam, sun yaar, one of Meghna's friend is coming today to meet her, we are meeting at Delhi Haat, you too come, she too is single, aaj teri setting pakka ho jayegi," Manish sounded more hopeful than Shyam.

"But yaar, there is some urgent work at home, and Delhi Haat is quite far from my home," Shyam said. This time it was not an excuse.

"Abe ullu ki dum, keep your mouth shut, you are coming, and that's final," Manish again decided on Shyam's behalf, as he used to.

Shyam too wanted to go and couldn't stop agree with Manish. Within next 30 minutes, he was standing at the gate of Delhi Haat.

Meghna introduced her beautiful friend Anusha to Shyam. Shyam couldn't take her eyes off her. She was damn beautiful. A symbol of Indian beauty, her innocent eyes and expressive face were enough for Shyam to like her.

Shyam bought the four entry tickets for all. They moved around, enjoyed the surrounding, and ate Cholle-Bhuttere. Shyam bought a pink colored top for Anusha and gifted to her. After much prodding, Anusha accepted the gift and thanked Shyam for the gift.

"Your choice of color is amazing," she complimented Shyam.

This single compliment made him feel victorious. Shyam was beaming with joy as if a divine blessing had been granted up on him.

"Well.If you don't mind, can I have your mobile number?" Shyam asked hesitantly.

"Sure, Why not?" she replied.

He saved her number in his mobile.

"Give me your number," she asked back.

Shyam thought something for a moment and said, "I gave you a miss call, check your phone."

He was cheated once so didn't want to take any chance this time. He dialed her number and she received a miss call. Shyam was relieved.

They parted with the promise to meet again soon.

.....

They met each other on the chat, mailed each other extensively, and talked on phone about thrice a week. First few days it went very well. Suddenly, calling frequency dropped drastically from Anusha's side. She even stopped replying his mails.

After countless missed calls, and hundreds of offline messages, she came to phone.

"Hello.Anusha."

"Hello Shyam, How are you?"

"I am not fine, Anusha, why not you picking my phone?"

"I was busy."

"Don't make false excuses, if I have done anything wrong, please forgive me, but don't do this to me."

"No Shyam, it's not like that."

"Then what's the problem?"

"Shyam.well.you are a good person and any girl would be lucky to be with you, but."

"But?" he shuddered beneath his stiffening feet.

"But Shyam.I never treated you as my boyfriend, I liked another guy; last week he proposed me and I said 'yes'," her voice rose and faded. and then rose again.

There was a pin drop silence on the other side of the phone. The only sound was the faint murmur of a fan rotating slowly overhead. Shyam didn't utter a single word.

"I am sorry, Shyam, I know I should have told this to you earlier, I am really sorry," she said and hanged the phone. She was gone.

The fan continued its gentle buzz; but otherwise the silence still prevailed. Minutes passed as he grappled with what he had just experienced. Thoughts overrode as each came up with their own logic of whatever happened to him and why. It was time to return to that killer notion of being alone again. Another girl added Shyam to her rejection list as he stood still on the heap of shattered hopes and broken dreams. Shyam, bathed in tears, looked outside the window and saw the sun setting as if even sun was too bidding goodbye to him and saying, "Sorry buddy."

A feeling of eerie frustration ran down his mind. The wall's peeling paint was staring at Shyam pessimistically. He looked at a small statue of Lord Shiva kept on the wood board and sulked.

"Why me?"

.....

"Shyam, I have one suggestion, which may work for you?" Manish said.

"Tell."

"First you promise that you won't get me wrong and won't get angry."

"Okay."

"Enjoy a night or two with a call-girl for the time being," Manish said tentatively. His face was so glum that he almost whispered his.

"Ohh.ok," Shyam was bit surprised, "so both of you think that I want girlfriend for sex only?"

"No, I don't mean that."

"Look Manish, I really don't know what you two think about me, but since we are good friends, let me tell you one thing, I don't want girlfriend for sex. Sex is something anyone can get easily in a metro city, isn't it?"

"Yes.you are right."

"Dost, its not about sex, it's about sharing feelings with someone special, it's about being together, it's about holding hands, it's about being in love, it's about companionship, and after all of them, it's about sex, the least concern for me," Shyam continued, "May be, it's difficult for you to understand this since you have got easily what I haven't."

Both Amit and Manish held Shyam's hands and whispered, "Sorry yaar."

The days passed and his hope for a girlfriend died its unnatural death. His innocence was lost somewhere in all this. He immersed himself into work and almost went into a shell. He just lost the craving to socialize or meeting new people.

(*This is a true story of one of my friend so names have been changed to protect the identities.)

My Message to My Friend:

Keep it simple, just be yourself and relax. If it works out, fine, if not, you still have your house, car, bank account, health, job, family, yourself and the future.

You are the one I want to spend my life with,

You are the one I want to spend every moment,

Happy or sad, grief or glad,

B'cos, with you every second spent is like a new life enliven.



I want to love you the way nobody has ever loved you,

I want to give you everything I have with me,

From the joy of giving till the point of sharing,

I want all of it to be as wonderful as it can never again be.



The day you entered my life,

I knew you had a persona that would bring me close to you,

From that one day till the day it is to this day,

Every day, every feeling and every moment feels always new.



Relations have changed and so the feelings,

From one look to this day when I 'm all yours,"

A Bollywood flick? Of course not..Chak De India defies all logic or commercial formula that has been prevailed in filmdom from past six decades. To count, it doesn't have a pair lead, no mushy-mushy dialogues (A must in Shahrukh movies), hero not running after heroine around trees, no item number from some hottie, no space for villain in the script since who can play villain better than the circumstances. Whew! Then what this movie is all about?

This movie is about the womanhood celebration, undying spirit of a true sportsman whose heart beats for his country. From the very first scene, story and characters create its own ambience which lasts till the last reel of the movie. One can feel the intuition that you are not going to watch a typical bollywood massala movie; but a story which is going to break several myths.

A story that needs to be told at any cost, even if Yashraj Banner has to compromise on their tested formula of romantic weepies and must say; the compromise was worth for!

Story begins with the ordeal of Kabir Khan (Shahrukh Khan), the captain of men's Indian national hockey team who missed a penalty corner in the deciding moments of the final match with arch rival Pakistan and gets labeled as a traitor by the hostile fans and unfair media. Here, Kabir Khan just didn't lose the match but his respect too to be called an honest citizen of India. Being a muslim made the curse worse.

Lost in isolation for next seven years; Kabir Khan comes back with a mission: to gain back the lost glory and self-respect with the same game which took everything a man could have! He joins as the coach of the women's national hockey team that consists of sixteen girls from different background, with difficult soaring attitude and sky-high egos. Now, coach has to build a team which can win the world championship of hockey scheduled after three months in Australia. Easier said than done? Naah! All the girls learn their lessons hard way and follow the funda that a team game can't be won just with individualistic brilliance.

Lacking team spirit finds its way through a fight at public place that erupts in the form of girls versus boys. Here, they bury the hatchet and entire team binds as ONE first time. Beating the boys to blue, girls come to know the importance of togetherness. This fight scene at MacDonald is shot beautifully with close-ups, tables turned upside down, while the coach and staff enjoy calmly. Story shows all the internal team-politics, ego-clashes, and all sorts of conflicts a team can have in any game.

Kabir Khan knows what it takes to get there. And what it means to return empty handed. This time, he wants to make sure that its different. He knows there are no second chances. Ultimately, for a coach, it comes just not to deal with different people but dealing with difficult egos. As the coach tells his team, "Is team kaa sabse bada gunda main hoon."

The racy script with witty punch lines makes the ride joyful throughout the movie. One can sense the sincere effort put by the writer (Jaideep Sahni did a brilliant job) while writing a hindi film story without using any clichéd heavy-duty dialogues, Switzerland in background, eye-candy glamour and 'Romance', a territory owned by Yashraj banner. The best thing about the script is that it doesn't wander from the main theme 'sports' even for a single moment. Audience feels like clapping for every single goal scored on the screen.

Now, come to the performances. Shahrukh is the mainstay of the entire plot and comes up with a performance that will shut up the critics who says that he is just good at romance with his silly mannerisms. After 'Swadesh', here is another movie where he is not playing the 'Star Shahrukh Khan' but 'Actor Shahrukh Khan'. His body language combined with apt dialogue delivery makes audience see a different Shahrukh whom we hardly know. From commercial point of view, he is the main crowd puller for the movie and won't disappoint them for
sure.

His chemistry with the girls, especially with Vidya Malvade, the captain of the hockey team, is really admirable. Few other girls too shine with their natural performances. Sagarika Ghatge as Preeti Sabharwal, lass from Chandigarh, is determined to teach her cricket-star boyfriend the true meaning of sportsmanship. She is a revelation in the movie, the scene stealer among the girls. It won't be surprised if audience gets to see her in more movies.

The music is composed by the Merchant brothers Salim Merchant and Sulaiman Merchant. Lyrics are written by Jaideep Sahni, who also wrote the screenplay and co-wrote the story with Shimit Amin. Title song rocks with its catchy lyrics and pacy music. It has become a sort of anthem for sports which one can hear being played in the background on Star TV India-England Cricket matches these days. Other songs are also good reflecting the sporty look through the lyrics. Though the story line goes on the expected line, but it is the screenplay and hard-hitting performance by Shahrukh that makes it more interesting. Shimit Amin has scored once again with another hit in kitty with 'Chak De India' and Yashraj will smile again to the box office collections.

It's good that nowadays sports are shown as the main theme effectively in the movies such as Lagaan, Tararumpum, Apne, and now Chak De India! Good show, bollywood.

Strengths: Script, Shahrukh Khan,

Weakness: Length, Editing

Verdict: Super hit

"Sahib, I am retired Lance Nayak Kartar Singh Sodhi," Kartar Singh introduced himself with folded hands to the S.H.O. of police station.

"Toh.what you want?" the officer asked in anger.

"Sahib, Police has picked up my son Ashok wrongly, without any charge on him," Kartar pleaded, "he hasn't done anything Sahib, please leave him."

"What you mean.Police is fraud?"

"Nahi Sahib, I certainly didn't mean that," his troubled eyes met the officer's, but dared not stay, the lashes fell down.

"Your son is a budding criminal; he is involved in a robbery case."

"How's that possible, Sahib?" Kartar asserted, "I know him very well, he can never do such illegal things."

"Now, don't teach me what is legal or illegal, just get lost, otherwise I would throw you too behind bars. Hawaldar, take him away from here," S.H.O. called his subordinate grinding his teeth.

"Aree sahib, don't do this injustice to us," gripped by a sudden panic, he shouted.

A constable tries to pull him back softly but he protested.

"First, you sit there," said constable.

With muted blues of pain, Kartar sat on the bench and leant heavily against the wall.

"Make him understand how things work here," the S.H.O. said to the constable with a smile mocking Kartar's vulnerability.

"Are you mad or what?" the constable said, "you are fiddling with bade sahib. Now listen to me, if you want your son to be free, arrange fifty thousand rupees before evening."

"Fifty thousand rupees?"

"Aree, you should be thankful, it's too less compared to what we are charging other boys," the constable said.

"But I don't have that much money," drops of sweat trickled down from his forehead.

"Better you do till today evening," the constable warned him and cut him off with his sharp, icy words, "otherwise."

"Please Hawaldar sahib, I beg of you."

"Don't waste my time and get lost," constable ignored his helplessness and got up from the bench.

Mouth dried with a pucker of gloom, tears rolled down his cheeks upon hearing this blatant reply from the constable. Sweat trickled down from the back of his ears onto his creased shirt. His deformed body ached with impatience; the rock hard wooden bench wasn't of much comfort.

"His son is one of the four robbers caught looting the Milan jewelry shop next to the ATM machine in the main market," the constable mouthed the details to his colleague seated shirtless with his legs on a table nearby diligently picking his nose.

It was loud enough for the entire chowki to listen to; Kartar could feel every single eye scrutinizing every inch of his being. For once he wished the ground swallowed him, his broken limbs, broken dreams, and not a trace of his wasted life be left behind.

--------

A life of sheer agony, both physical as well as psychological, Lance Nayak Kartar Singh Sodhi served the Indian army for six years. He took great pride in rattling off the agonies he faced while in the army to anyone who cared to listen.

"One had to wake up at three in the morning and jog. Jog until your legs cried out for rest. On a scorching summer day I jogged till the moon went up in the sky."

"Once I was late for the parade.my commanding officer made me circle the huge ground till he returned from his meetings. It was almost four in the afternoon when someone reminded him about me!"

Most people in the village avoided him when they could. For no one had the time to listen to his stories of wars, no one cared for and none remembered. So the brave soldier would regale his son with tales of his encounters with the enemy. The little boy's eyes would widen with surprise as his father shot, jumped, yelled, and killed in the battlefield.

"I was posted with the 3rd JAT Regiment (Infantry) in the Kargil Sector," he would tell this with pride.

"On 20 Jun 99, my unit was tasked to capture Point 5140. As the unit reached the conflict point, the enemy opened fire on us," although he had grown frail in body, his eyes would shine like two piercing stars when he talked, "We retaliated, but ran out of ammunition; and our signal instrument too crashed. Under devastating fire, we were heavily outnumbered."

"In an audacious move, I decided to attack the enemy position from the rear along a sheer cliff face," Oozing enthusiasm and rare joy, he would keep telling, "Undaunted by fire, I, followed by three jawans, climbed up and hurled two grenades into the enemy chowki."

His son, with his heart in mouth, would eagerly hang onto every single word that his brave father uttered and hungered for more.

"As three enemy soldiers came out, I single handedly engaged them in close fire fight and killed them all," Ashok would see his father's eyes roving over with a not so innocent look, "The enemy started heavy artillery firing. While I was busy fighting the enemy, a mortar shell exploded near me. In spite of serious injuries on my chest, face and arms yet I did not withdraw an inch but kept fighting."

"Phir papa?" Ashok would ask.

"Phir." Kartar paused for a moment without any sign of pain or anxiety on his face, "I opened my eyes in the hospital. My right arm and leg were amputated."

"You weren't scared, papa?" Ashok would question innocently.

"I have no fear, beta. One goes into the battlefield with the head held high, there is nothing to regret. Whatever had to happen has happened. It is not every day that one gets a chance to die for the country, I am happy that I did it for the country,'' he would say, his eyes crinkling with a smile.

He still remembered the day when he had received a stupendous welcome by this city with open arms and flowers. The crowds at the railway station had merged into a single huge being, whispering, craning its neck, its eyes probing the horizon for the brave hero, who won Veer Chakra, to appear. He could see mothers pointing him out to their kids who looked at him with a mixture of awe and curiosity. The huge horde of people thronged every available inch of space to give their hero a red-carpet welcome.

"We want to show how much we love you and your sacrifice was worth for,'' said a woman with garland in hands.

He was sitting on the front seat of an open jeep and the people were gathered on both sides of street to welcome their hero of Kargil. As the convoy winded its way through the city roads, people lined up significant portions of the route,

The convoy was stopped again by a large group of women who swore their support to him, put tilak on his forehead, and assured him of their all possible help in whatever they could offer.

All local newspapers had written about the son of the city coming back to home. A function was held by the local MLA to felicitate him. The Deputy Collector awarded him 50,000 rupees, a shawl and a memento. The Deputy Collector further honored him with high praise, "Words won't do justice to his worth. Dry speeches of gratitude are not sufficient to recognize his sacrifice, he is not the general citizen, but in true sense the son of the soil who love his country."

The local MLA too praised him highly and announced, "You have risked your life for our Mother India and made our city proud. We won't let you down. On the behalf of my party, I an